“When Motherhood Feels Like Refereeing”
Summer brings the freedom I look forward to-longer evenings, less rigid structure and a slower pace, but alongside that shift comes a quieter challenge of staying grounded as a mother. When the routines loosen and the constant noise of summer settles in, it becomes harder for me to stay consistent in God’s Word. Through the constant snack requests, the 543 “mom” calls and the sibling rivalries….THE SIBLING RIVALRIES!!...I often find myself stretched thin and praying for wisdom as I referee one bickering moment after another.
Recently, as I contemplated buying a whistle to add to my daily outfit, I landed in Proverbs 16. Verse 31 stated, “Gray hair is the crown of glory; it is gained in a righteous life.” I snickered as I thought of how much gray hair I have to disguise with blonde highlights and how early those grays seem to appear in parenting. But on a deeper note, the verse really captured my attention. Perhaps the gray hairs are reminders that God is doing a work within us too as we navigate parenthood.
Sometimes parenting has a way of humbling us and reminding us how much we need God every day. Somewhere in between correcting attitudes, reheating my coffee for the 3rd time and balancing the Jekyll and Hyde teenage emotions I found myself asking “God, how on earth am I to handle this without losing my patience…or my mind?” In those moments, I began to wonder if the stretching and the constant refereeing, of parenting was all part of cultivating something deeper within us-revealing the areas of prayer that may be needed most. Lately, I’ve felt drawn to pray specific areas for my children; not just for the usual safety and health, but deep, heartfelt prayers to shape them….
For self-control when their emotions are high. For a desire to listen to The Holy Spirit when life offers a decision. For humility with the gifts they discover and for gratitude to sink within their hearts. For patience when prayer requests feel unanswered and for strength that comes only from The Lord. These are the desires of my heart for my children and the requests I want to keep lifting as parenting continues to open my eyes.
So maybe this is where purpose comes into those refereeing moments….we aren’t just blowing whistles and choosing sides…we are discreetly learning how to intentionally pray for them and deepening our dependence on our Father. It teaches me that on those extra hard days, my prayer may not need to be “Lord, remove this hard moment,” but “Lord, teach me to see the purpose in this moment and guide me to the prayer,” before I rush into correction.
Proverbs describes gray hair being a crown…not a burden. I like that idea. It gives me a fresh perspective. Maybe we can see our silver strands as quiet reminders of purpose, perseverance and prayer as we keep pushing on…with our whistles
